


5 Lessons the Kaminoans Didn't Give

by Merfilly



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Asexual Character, Bondage and Discipline, Innuendo, Multi, Sex Education, Xenophilia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-01
Updated: 2016-11-01
Packaged: 2018-08-28 09:54:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8441176
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Merfilly/pseuds/Merfilly
Summary: Sex, clones, and discovery. Or, The Kaminoans left out Sex-Ed, but Jango's buddies didn't. And the Vod'e keep learning.





	

**Author's Note:**

> 1\. Credit to [Reulte](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Reulte/pseuds/Reulte) as the first place I saw clones refer to their dicks as 'deece'.
> 
> 2\. Shaak's cadet shadow is to be found in [zinjadu](http://archiveofourown.org/users/zinjadu/pseuds/zinjadu)'s [Life, and Other Details: Heart's Children](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8305804/chapters/19225513). Borrowed without permission, but hopefully some leniency from the awesome writer!
> 
> 3\. Again, I'm pretty certain Reulte is responsible for my headcanon about Fives and Twi'lek women.

1\. The Mandalorians Jango had brought in to shape up the fresh-baked army were the disreputable sorts like himself, the bounty hunters who couldn't go home. They came from all parts of Mandalore's system, and were all sick to death of the Duchess's precious peace and reform. Not a one of them looked on the Army as anything but a job, not even when the cadets started moving rapidly through puberty and into the physical prime that could be fine-tuned without putting as much stress on developing muscle and bone.

That didn't keep those cadets from trying. There was something inherent in their coding to seek the strongest, and for them, that meant the instructors. Fooling around with each other was one thing; successfully getting past a teacher's guard was a whole different achievement. It was harmless enough, and none of the cadets were getting badly hurt, so the Kaminoans didn't even notice.

Until CC-1091 managed to convince Carith Tel to do a little calibration on his 'deece', the cadets had pretty much been convinced all humans were just like they were. Carith Tel, being quite contently female and more than able to use her body to her advantage was not shy on re-educating CC-1091, who took the information back to his batchmates.

Apparently humans came in a shape that had a second 'holster' and were equipped with a 'detonator switch' that took more work than a 'deece' but was so worth it in the end.

2\. It was inspection day, this time of the cadets that were nearest to training completion, in their tactical blacks instead of armor. Shaak Ti and her ever-present cadet shadow walked the lines slowly, until Shaak's forward progress was arrested by the faintest smile on the face of one brother.

"Cadet Maxim, may I inquire as to what joy you have found today? Would you care to share with the others, given that we have a serious affair ahead of us, with the Senate Oversight committee coming, and we are all in need of humor."

Maxim kept his eyes straight ahead, but didn't bother to hide the widening of the smile. "As you asked, General, I was contemplating asking if you needed a bit of a help setting off a few explosions to handle the stress."

All around them, the cadets were hard-pressed to stifle their shock and amusement and respect for their brother actually saying what more than a few of them had thought in the weeks since the Togruta Jedi had arrived. They had seen all the hard muscles under those robes, when she skivved down to train with them in combat. They knew she was viciously strong, and wickedly smart. More than a few envied Maxim for actually saying it out loud.

Shaak found the words hard to follow, but the surge in their Force presence, the press of the Living Force this time, helped guide her to the right answer, even as she felt her shadow on the verge of dying of embarrassment. She stepped fully in front of Maxim, letting her lekku curl at the tips just a little.

"I prefer my explosives to be handled by experts, Cadet. You lack the needed experience, for now." It was a calculated response, one that firmly dashed the hopes, yet saved face too, because it was not 'no', but merely 'not right now'.

Maxim stood even taller, and his brothers definitely felt envy as the inspection continued apace.

Shaak would make certain her fellow Jedi learned that particular slang, especially the younger ones, even as she wondered how it had come about.

3\. "So what are they for?"

Fives sat back and knocked a drink back, before casting another appreciative look over at the dancers, one that was more than a little hopeful.

"You know about the switch, right?"

Every one of the brothers listening nodded, though a couple with that look that said they had never touched the switch. Fives knew they eventually would, if they didn't get killed first; there were a lot of women out there that had to find out for themselves if a vod was actually truly functional as a human male.

"Those, the lekku, they're like time-delay switches. You just pet and kiss on them, and the explosion builds all the better for it," he told them. "Remember, gentle, unless they tell you to get rougher… but so worth it."

"Hear tell, you're quite the expert on Twi'lek women," a newer voice said, and Fives looked to see which brother was joining them… only to go pale as he saw the cheek tats that made Commander Bly stand out. The Commander waited a long moment, then continued. "You boys, listen to what he said, and they'll take good care of you."

Fives breathed a little easier, even as his captive audience wandered off to test their luck. "Thanks for not busting my balls, Commander," he said quietly.

"You might get around, Trooper… but only good words ever get back about you. Figured that advice can't go wrong, if they're going to be out there looking for fun."

4\. "Nothing?"

The soft word made Waxer wince and try to move away, but Boil held him close. "Shh, vod, shh. Stay with me. What we've got was never meant to be about what happened in the berth. I wish… I wish you'd told me a long time ago."

"It makes you happy, takes away some of the pain of living," Waxer told him, before cuddling into the chest under his ear. "I really don't mind—"

"But you don't get a real explosion from it," Boil said, firmly. "So we stop trying that, vod. You said you do like this, being held?"

"I love it, love feeling you close, love the way you pet my skin, but the actual sex part? Yeah, that's not really making me go boom." He pushed up to look at his lover, panicked. "You won't leave… I'd do it—"

"Hush, Waxer. Hush. We said our vows, and this? This isn't why I told you I want to raise little biters with you some day. I can more than handle my own 'deece', and I really enjoy the way you cuddle," Boil said. "So promise me, if we step over your line, you tell me, so we can be strong as ever."

"I can do that, Boil, if you're sure."

"I am."

5\. "I can explain?"

Jesse just looked at Hardcase, glared at him more like it, then looked at Tup. "Were you sober?"

"Yes sir."

"Did you consent of your own free will?"

"Yes sir."

"Are you still consenting?"

"Yes sir."

"Alright. But next time, Hardcase, pick a room with shielding or use a gag!"

Jesse carefully ignored the moan from Tup at that suggestion, withdrew from the room, carefully putting the 'do not disturb' tag on the handle before leaving the pair to their exploration of pain endurance and pleasure rewards.

He wondered if Kix was busy as he did so….

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Experts](https://archiveofourown.org/works/8443975) by [B_Radley](https://archiveofourown.org/users/B_Radley/pseuds/B_Radley)




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